There are things that I know about my sister (lots of things) and things that I don't know about my sister (probably even more things).
There are things that I would like to know about my sister (what her heart desires), and there are things that I would not like to know about my sister (what she looks like naked).
Anyone who has a sister will understand these feelings, including my sister.
However, sometimes I think she forgets which topics should be part of the conversation and which parts should not! For instance...
Recently, we were discussing the fact that a certain lingerie store was having their semi-annual sale and that she had found pretty good deals on some over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders. I also decided that I needed to update my undergarment wardrobe and should go there as well. This kind of conversation is not irregular with the two of us, and we have learned to keep it pretty low-key, because my husband doesn't really like hearing about her undergarments. Let alone seeing them. Yes. she. did.
I stupidly asked my sister what her new undergarments looked like, and she proceeded to lift her shirt and show me! Now, this wouldn't have been a problem with me usually, because she has seen plenty of my undergarments and such with her being around so much when Micheal was little and still nursing. But, this was no such instance! There was only a small part of the support system made of opaque fabric. That is to say, I saw way more parts of my sister than I was ready for! If she had given me a little more preparation for what I was about to see instead of just flashing me all of a sudden, it might not have made such a stir, but OH. MY. GOSH!
My sister is definitely more endowed than I am, which I knew about way before she ever thought it appropriate to raise her shirt at me.
So, the next time my sister brings up certain topics of conversation, I guess I will have learned my lesson and I will either talk with my eyes closed, or not get on this topic before it ever gets to that point again. :)
Friday, July 08, 2005
Monday, July 04, 2005
When I grow up, I want to be a...
When I was younger, there were many things that I wanted to do with my life when I was done with school and out on my own.
None of them, though, involved being poorer than dirt and living in the sticks.
Well, not that I'm starving or living beyond my means, we live comfortably and we get the things we want, eventually.
A few of my options, though, were jobs in the city, making lots of money, married to a man with even more money. Being able to go shopping when I didn't feel like wearing any of the clothes in my closet, things like that.
Sometimes I feel envious of those people that do live that way. And then I look at my life and the situation I'm in now, and I realize that God put me on the path that was exactly what I wanted, even if it didn't look the way I thought it might look. I have the means to live the way I like, I have a husband that loves me unconditionally, and I have been blessed with a child that God chose especially for me.
So, even when I am doing things in this little country home of mine that I would have never in a million years imagined myself doing, then I try to remind myself that it's nowhere near where I thought it would be, but there's nowhere else I'd rather be.
Happy 4th!
None of them, though, involved being poorer than dirt and living in the sticks.
Well, not that I'm starving or living beyond my means, we live comfortably and we get the things we want, eventually.
A few of my options, though, were jobs in the city, making lots of money, married to a man with even more money. Being able to go shopping when I didn't feel like wearing any of the clothes in my closet, things like that.
Sometimes I feel envious of those people that do live that way. And then I look at my life and the situation I'm in now, and I realize that God put me on the path that was exactly what I wanted, even if it didn't look the way I thought it might look. I have the means to live the way I like, I have a husband that loves me unconditionally, and I have been blessed with a child that God chose especially for me.
So, even when I am doing things in this little country home of mine that I would have never in a million years imagined myself doing, then I try to remind myself that it's nowhere near where I thought it would be, but there's nowhere else I'd rather be.
Happy 4th!
Saturday, July 02, 2005
Call for help... or so I thought!
It was a hot sunny day one day this week when I was doing nothing hanging out with my child and my phone rang. Thanks to the miracle of caller ID, I recognized the number and excitedly answered the phone. However, when I said, "Hello?" there was no response. So, I tried again, "Hello?" still with no reply.
Now, here is where I now realize that I watch too many detective shows on television. Instead of hanging up, I know that she must have called me for a reason, so I start listening. I can't hear her, but I can hear movement, and a little bit later, I hear a man's voice, but I can't tell what he's saying.
I am thinking that she must have called my number for a reason, maybe because she was going somewhere she wanted me to hear, or that something was happening to her and she wanted someone to be able to find her and help her, or... my imagination was running away...
I knew that it was none of these, but it still peaked my interest just the same.
I continued listening, and then I thought I heard her voice, so I started calling out her name, hoping that she would hear me and realize that her phone was on. Now, knowing this person, I figured that her phone was in her purse, which stays open, and that she would be able to hear me if I yelled enough. So, I kept trying. Then my little Micheal decided he wanted in on the fun, too, so he "yelled" into the phone, too. All, however, to no avail. So, figuring that she would eventually figure it out, I turned off my phone, knowing that would close the line.
However, the higher powers that be decided that this was not to be the end of our encounter. I turned my phone back on to make sure that it had ended the call, only to hear the man's voice again, with more movement.
Now, I'm thinking that this is the perfect opportunity to get some dirt on this person that called me, but my conscience got the best of me and I decided instead to keep yelling. This time, I just plain yelled, and the top of my lungs, in the highest note I could reach, until my breath ran out. Still, she never came to the phone. So, I turned it off again.
You'd think that the dang line would be cut off, but it wasn't. She was still connected. So, she was still subjected to my rantings. Now, though, I decided that if she was going to be wasting her minutes and not even talking to me, I was going to have some fun with this...
"This is your purse talking to you.... your purse is possessed!!!"
"Is there anyone out there? I'm trapped in here!"
"Somebody, anybody, tell her that her phone is talking to her!"
"Hello, can you hear me? I've fallen and I can't get up!
You get the picture. Finally, after about five minutes of continued attempts to disconnect the line, she finally figured out that her purse was making noises, and she picked up the phone to find me laughing at her.
Who was this bright person that I speak of? Who forgot to lock her keypad before putting her phone back into her purse?
I don't think it would be fair of me to divulge the identity without the person having a chance to defend herself, and since she's not writing this, I guess you'll have to wait and see if she 'fesses up!
Now, here is where I now realize that I watch too many detective shows on television. Instead of hanging up, I know that she must have called me for a reason, so I start listening. I can't hear her, but I can hear movement, and a little bit later, I hear a man's voice, but I can't tell what he's saying.
I am thinking that she must have called my number for a reason, maybe because she was going somewhere she wanted me to hear, or that something was happening to her and she wanted someone to be able to find her and help her, or... my imagination was running away...
I knew that it was none of these, but it still peaked my interest just the same.
I continued listening, and then I thought I heard her voice, so I started calling out her name, hoping that she would hear me and realize that her phone was on. Now, knowing this person, I figured that her phone was in her purse, which stays open, and that she would be able to hear me if I yelled enough. So, I kept trying. Then my little Micheal decided he wanted in on the fun, too, so he "yelled" into the phone, too. All, however, to no avail. So, figuring that she would eventually figure it out, I turned off my phone, knowing that would close the line.
However, the higher powers that be decided that this was not to be the end of our encounter. I turned my phone back on to make sure that it had ended the call, only to hear the man's voice again, with more movement.
Now, I'm thinking that this is the perfect opportunity to get some dirt on this person that called me, but my conscience got the best of me and I decided instead to keep yelling. This time, I just plain yelled, and the top of my lungs, in the highest note I could reach, until my breath ran out. Still, she never came to the phone. So, I turned it off again.
You'd think that the dang line would be cut off, but it wasn't. She was still connected. So, she was still subjected to my rantings. Now, though, I decided that if she was going to be wasting her minutes and not even talking to me, I was going to have some fun with this...
"This is your purse talking to you.... your purse is possessed!!!"
"Is there anyone out there? I'm trapped in here!"
"Somebody, anybody, tell her that her phone is talking to her!"
"Hello, can you hear me? I've fallen and I can't get up!
You get the picture. Finally, after about five minutes of continued attempts to disconnect the line, she finally figured out that her purse was making noises, and she picked up the phone to find me laughing at her.
Who was this bright person that I speak of? Who forgot to lock her keypad before putting her phone back into her purse?
I don't think it would be fair of me to divulge the identity without the person having a chance to defend herself, and since she's not writing this, I guess you'll have to wait and see if she 'fesses up!
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Yes, I am!
Today I got to spend some fun time swimming in this hotter than ever East Texas weather with our friends Amanda Sue and her husband, and my sister. We made my husband cook his famous burgers, and we gorged ourselves and then played the part of the beached whales afterward. Once Amanda and Daniel had left, Melinda and I stayed out there a little longer, and my child took his nap. I had already gotten plenty of sun on my front, and I didn't want to look different depending on which side of me you saw, so I was laying on my float in the middle of the pool with my back exposed to the sun. All was going well, I was almost asleep, until I it felt like I moved my toe across paper and had gotten a paper cut. But, being on the float, I knew that wasn't possible, so I picked up my foot and sat up to look at it, when a little red bug then attacked my other ankle! I don't know if you've ever tried to get off of a float in the middle of the pool very quickly and at the same time gracefully, but it wasn't working for me. I went all the way under, hollering while I did... because that little red bug was a WASP (and I don't mean in the political sense of the acronym.) and it stung me TWICE! OUCH!
I was a big girl, though, and remembering that my child was asleep in the room closest to the pool, I didn't scream really loudly all the curse words that came in my mind. Instead, I pounded my feet on the bottom of the pool trying to make the pain go away. It didn't work. Then my sister remembered that when she got stung by a wasp, they put meat tenderizer on it to take away the pain, so she went and got ours. When she put it on there, I couldn't tell what was worse, the pain from the sting, or the fact that she picked up the seasoned meat tenderizer... it was basically putting salt into a paper cut. I almost cried then. Instead, I made her get Jonathan, and he got the bug stuff, and put it on my toe and my ankle, and now they only hurt in spurts, like cramps or something, and that doesn't feel very good. My husband is so sweet, that then he went back inside and told me that if my tongue started swelling, to yell for him so that he could take me to the ER. And, just how was I going to do that with a swollen tongue? I didn't ask. I figured it would be okay. So, here I sit, doctored up by two people that I feel sure will NEVER earn a doctoral degree in medicine, and I am reminded again, that Yes, I am a wuss.
Stupid wasp. And I didn't even get to kill it.
I was a big girl, though, and remembering that my child was asleep in the room closest to the pool, I didn't scream really loudly all the curse words that came in my mind. Instead, I pounded my feet on the bottom of the pool trying to make the pain go away. It didn't work. Then my sister remembered that when she got stung by a wasp, they put meat tenderizer on it to take away the pain, so she went and got ours. When she put it on there, I couldn't tell what was worse, the pain from the sting, or the fact that she picked up the seasoned meat tenderizer... it was basically putting salt into a paper cut. I almost cried then. Instead, I made her get Jonathan, and he got the bug stuff, and put it on my toe and my ankle, and now they only hurt in spurts, like cramps or something, and that doesn't feel very good. My husband is so sweet, that then he went back inside and told me that if my tongue started swelling, to yell for him so that he could take me to the ER. And, just how was I going to do that with a swollen tongue? I didn't ask. I figured it would be okay. So, here I sit, doctored up by two people that I feel sure will NEVER earn a doctoral degree in medicine, and I am reminded again, that Yes, I am a wuss.
Stupid wasp. And I didn't even get to kill it.
Monday, June 27, 2005
I'm a Big Wuss
Today my child had his one year old shots. Knowing that the point of the whole doctor visit was to inject potentially healing fluids into my little man's plump little thigh, I enlisted the strength of my husband. I say strength, and I initially meant strength in the definition of muscle usage, but then I realized I really meant that I also needed him to be the strong unnerved daddy for me, too.
I can't stand needles. I mean, yes, I have gone through labor, and I had the whole IV thing and epidural and all, but I didn't watch them put them in, so that was my saving grace. But, with my child, it's a whole different story! I can't watch him get his shots. I can't hold him because I'm not strong enough to hold him down without him moving. But, he did really well! The best part is that we don't have to go back for any more shots until he's 4 years old! I don't even want to think about that yet... HOLY COW!
But, I really am thankful that my child does well with his vaccinations, and I don't have to deal with any bad after effects. The worst thing that happens to him is that he gets a little hard bump on the spot where they get him. If that's all that happens, we can handle that! :)
Thank God my child deals with pain much better than I do! Like I said, I'm such a wuss!
I can't stand needles. I mean, yes, I have gone through labor, and I had the whole IV thing and epidural and all, but I didn't watch them put them in, so that was my saving grace. But, with my child, it's a whole different story! I can't watch him get his shots. I can't hold him because I'm not strong enough to hold him down without him moving. But, he did really well! The best part is that we don't have to go back for any more shots until he's 4 years old! I don't even want to think about that yet... HOLY COW!
But, I really am thankful that my child does well with his vaccinations, and I don't have to deal with any bad after effects. The worst thing that happens to him is that he gets a little hard bump on the spot where they get him. If that's all that happens, we can handle that! :)
Thank God my child deals with pain much better than I do! Like I said, I'm such a wuss!
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