Sucks to Be Him

I found this on a news site, and thought that I should share it with my adoring public. The parts in italics are my own personal comments...

3 wives greet man after triple bypass surgery

LONDON - Some people bring flowers, others bring balloons. When Melvyn Reed's three wives showed up to visit him at the hospital, they brought an unexpected curtain call to his years as a double bigamist.
British police confirmed that after Melvyn Reed woke from his triple bypass heart operation earlier this year(wonder if stress caused his heart problems), his complicated marital affairs took a turn for a worse. All three of his spouses had turned up at the same time, despite his efforts to stagger their visits.

Media reports say that, upon realizing that something was amiss(and how did they realize this, did they know each other?), the wives held a meeting in the parking lot, and learned that they were all married to the same man.

The 59-year-old company director from Kettering in central England turned himself into police on May 12 saying he was married to three women at the same time, and confessed to bigamy, an illegal offense in Britain(where isn't it illegal, so I know not to move there!), London's Metropolitan Police said in a statement.

A spokeswoman for the Crown Prosecution Service confirmed that Reed had turned himself in to police in Wimbledon, south London in the presence of his lawyer, and admitted he was a bigamist.

He pleaded guilty to two charges of bigamy on July 19 at the Wimbledon Magistrates' court, and was given a suspended sentence of four months in prison and ordered to pay 70 pounds ($126) in costs, police said. (Is that ALL? $126? Are you kidding? Does he have to pay anything to each woman, at least?)

It wasn't immediately possible to reach Reed or his three wives. A phone call to one of the women went unanswered. Reed's lawyer Laurence Grant was not immediately available at his office for comment.

The Metropolitan Police said Reed married his first wife, Jean Grafton, in 1966, then left her without divorcing her. He went on to marry Denise Harrington in 1998, then married Lyndsey Hutchinson in 2003.

British media have widely reported that Reed recently moved back in with his first wife, Grafton. They say she is the mother of his three grown children.

The Metropolitan Police said Harrington and Hutchinson had sought advice on getting their marriages annulled. But media reports say lawyers have advised the women that their marriages were never valid.

Interesting, isn't it? How some people think that the law doesn't apply to them, or how one woman isn't enough for some men. What a jerk. This makes me very thankful that I am married to the ONE man who chose me to be his ONLY wife. :)

One of those days

Have you ever been in the shower and forgotten whether you were about to pick up the shampoo or the conditioner, and you couldn't remember whether you had already shampooed or not?

Have you ever shave your underarms and washed up, and then gotten out of the shower, dried off, and remembered you needed to shave your legs because you were planning on wearing shorts, so you had to get BACK in the shower just to shave?

Have you ever been in such a hurry to get out of the bathroom that you put your makeup on, and your lipstick, and then remembered that you forgot to brush your teeth?

I have.
Today, in fact!

I better get back on track by Monday when school starts. Ugh.

Just Like College

I couldn't resist sharing this with you...

20 Ways Parenthood is Just Like College

1. You feel like you're constantly being tested.

2. Someone's always smarter than you (or at least they think they are).

3. Your roommates are slobs, and they steal your food.

4. There's nothing in your bank account.

5. All-nighters.

6. You get kicked out of the library for leaving behind crumbs and creating a ruckus.

7. Keg parties and parties at Chuck E. Cheese produce the same kind of hangover.

8. You never seem to be able to get the place to yourself.

9. Naps.

10. You hate your roommates' music and they hate yours.

11. You can neither identify nor locate the source of that funky smell coming from your roommate's closet.

12. Five in the morning is really really early -- or really, really late -- depending on whether or not you've been to bed yet.

13. People talk to you while you're in the shower.

14. You're too exhausted to retain what you're reading.

15. Oh, now you can identify that smell. You forgot to take that half-eaten sandwich out of the backpack yesterday.

16. You're wearing your college sweatshirt again -- it's the cleanest thing you could find.

17. Someone always leaves the party crying.

18. Hey! How about pizza? Again!

19. You think you're the only one who feels clueless.

20. It goes so fast.

Some of these could just apply to a spouse, but I thought they were funny enough about my child.

Hope you get a giggle, too! :)

All Signs Point to...

Well, quite frankly, they all point to this year not being my favorite. Maybe I'll amend this statement in the near future, but today just wasn't a good day, and I don't know HOW tomorrow could be.

Our new principal handed out all these new things we're supposed to do, like decorate our rooms and new discipline techniques... Then I get to my room only to discover that our air conditioner doesn't work. Then I start putting desks back into place, only to find that most of them are stuck to the floor from when they re-did our floors. So, when they moved, they left holes in my one year old flooring.

Then I turned on my computer only to find that the updates they were supposed to do over the summer weren't done on my computer, because of some password problem or something... like they couldn't have called me.... harumph.

The only bright spot to my day is that they said we could leave at 3:15, and when I do, in mere minutes, it is to go and visit my newest "nephew," as I received a phone call yesterday evening announcing his impending arrival. I'm so excited! One baby boy here, and another little "nephew" coming soon! I knew I didn't need to get pregnant again yet! :) I'll have my baby fix plenty of times before I need another one.

Here's to hoping that the rest of the week shapes up better than today! :)

Nothing

I got nothing.

I have nothing in my head that I would consider funny, rude, thought-provoking or even remotely interesting.

This may be in part to the fact that it's Saturday, and on Monday I have to go back to work. I think just knowing that has somehow diminished my mental capabilities. I think I know that I am going to have to start thinking extra hard in just two days about how to plan out the rest of the school year, and I don't want to waste any unnecessary thought processes on anything else.

Sorry for being so lame.

Maybe I'll have more later this week. I'm expecting to become an "aunt" again any time now. I'll let you know.